“red light… red light… red light!!!!!!”

my friend shouted as i instantly stepped on the brakes before the car went past the last cross street along geary blvd.  i was staring at the clear pacific ocean while telling jc what’s been going on with me.  “damn, you should learn how to pay attention when you’re driving, man,” he remarked.  i believed this has been the tenth time he reminded me about paying attention to the lights in sf.  i didn’t blame him.  i was nonchalantly enjoying the smooth drive and bullshitting around with our conversation.  we just ate at the pho place by 6th and geary.  it’s been a while since i haven’t been there.  when i lived in the city, his friends and i would eat late-night thai food along california after a good study.  that was back then. 

i could say jc’s one of the street-smartest persons i’ve ever known.  i knew it was wrong, but he used an ordinary membership card to jam an electronic parking meter where i parked.  he knew how to act and what to expect in areas with the highest crime rates.  i knew stockton had the highest crime-rate when i dated this girl who had ghetto friends.  jc forbade me to pursue the relationship.  it eventually crumbled.  i wasn’t feeling the excitement of either running away from the cops, or being arrested for shoplifting, slanging, credit card scams, and all things that those people didn’t care less as long as they got the money. 

that wasn’t the life for me, although sometimes it’s nice to know what’s going on around the streets.  suffering is everywhere, and these people sometimes do it because of survival or because they knew they’d end up behind bars as they’ve been before.  i needed a stable future, a future that could provide for my future family, something to look forward to give back to my parents, to support the rest of my younger siblings if possible.  there’s so much out there that anyone could do, and being on the cop’s hit list wasn’t in the plan at all.  education and learning experiences were the best ways to gain more out of life.  hence, knowledge is power.  power that can be stretched and molded in different forms, its metamorphosis catering to every social cataylst.  then what?  you give back to the community.  that’s the best thing that i could imagine as of now.  as mark twain said, “it is noble to teach oneself, but still nobler to teach others – and less trouble.” i can concur to that.  whether you live as a shepherd in a byre, or a ceo of a fortune 500 company, teaching through different forms is the best way that anyone can get out of his/her life. 

my upper back’s been having this muscle spasm, good thing his pad has a somewhat complete machine workout set. did some deadlifts while he worked on his abs.  i asked about gm, i met both of them at the law offices a few years back.  we used to chat on yahoo instant messenger at work until the regulation came out to most companies tracking employee productivity. 

“he’s been doing good, trying to move out of his place because his other roommate is going back to l.a. and the other one doesn’t know how to pay the rent on time.”  

i used to spar with him until i quit kung fu last year.  too busy with other priorities.  i betcha he could kick my ass now.  haha.  his recent e-mail correspondence at work read that he’s been going more often.  oooh.  “well that’s his only way to workout these days.  he’s always doing stuff with his girlfriend besides work,” jc commented on my sarcastic reckoning.  i needed to get more mp3’s from him as i lost all that i copied from a corrupted hard drive that occured during the holiday.  his mom still has the same warm hospitality, offering me and the rest of his homeez food whenever we swing by his place.  jc and his mom talk in chinese while i try to figure out the english words that he utters in between the cultural form of conundrum.  i used to play volleyball with his older brother, online starcraft and command ‘n conquer once in a while.  then i got tired of the regular habit.  starcraft, warcraft, diablo: it seems that i easily lose interest in every video game when i either finish it or i don’t get to the next level.  although once in a while i play splinter cell in my brother’s xbox when i pay a visit. 

jc was the one who got me into imports, although i didn’t have the budget to be involved with the scene.  i learned to be satisfied with what i had and i eventually grew tired of it as well.  now some of my other circle got into it when mine was already in a dereliction.  no more exciting caravans to the midnight races in milpitas.  no more wild swerving while racing with other cars on the freeway.  none of that.  what’s better now?  safety.  i’m too young to ruin any part of my body just because of a street race.  the police rebellion mentality died down when a political science professor justified the fact that speeding regulations do prevent accidents.  me and my immature neglection.  hey, that’s the youthful zest right there.  my brother was lucky he didn’t have any bruises when his car got totalled a month ago.  an angel must have protected him.  no traumas, no nightmares, no nothing.  my brother, my lucky brother.  that transpired before i just called him and told him to drive safely while i was coming back to berkeley and he was driving out of ucsf’s garage.  does the language have anything to do with opposite concurring events?  hence, knock on wood?  a car, lit with with brutal imagination, can smoke any clutch-held revving vehicle that challenges its provoking looks.  i’m done with that.  haters can say what they want, and i don’t care because i want to think long-term.  when my hair starts receding, so does the depreciation of a car’s blue book value, less the phat custom-built expenses not covered by insurance.  drive from a to b is all that matters to me, although i still admire those who come up with all the money to display theirs in regular import car shows.  i don’t even go to those events anymore.

i asked jc after he withdrew money from b of a, “so what do you do when a girl whom you haven’t talked to in a long time calls you, and you know that she only wants to get something from you?”

“sexual favors?”

“no, she’s already taken.  but she has this tendency to use you although it’s not her intention (or she subtly knows it) to do so.”

“don’t even bother,” jc retorded as we went back to geary.  this one girl just called me after not talking to her for a while.  i guess i knew wassup.

i try to be nice to people.  but after knowing how some people treat you like they’re using you for certain purposes, i just gotta back off.  being professional at work requires showing respect and self-control at the heat of deciding a work procedure between different conflicts of interest.  but when it comes to overt unprofessionalism.  not even a single piece of work is done but corporate rudeness ensues.  those people will learn something in their lives one day.  i decided to move on after a cold-war, backstabbing clash with a senior co-worker.  it’s not worth bringing the hatred even when you start your first hour at work.  one of npr’s documentary about a political prisoner in china started his life back after he got out at age 40.  with the right timing, connections, and business strategies, his motorcycle business soon flourished the asian market.  now his daughters are going to boarding school in england.  when asked what his comments about the past were; says he, “just move on…”  nothing beats leaving everything in the past.  it’s hard, but it’s quite enlightening to the soul.

i have a weakness for twix candy bars, i just consumed almost half of the fun size pack since yesterday.  no wonder i survived eating pho and the free strawberry smoothie i got from jamba juice yesterday.

attending a birthday bash of a friend in one of the city’s posh lounges tonight.  should i stay or should i go?


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