sunday just started earlier than i thought. i ended up sleeping early while deciding not to go out and party. i heard the people upstairs calling their friends for directions to their house party. closed my eyes and breathed deeply and slowly as i dozed off. got text messages and calls from friends about their whereabouts to and at a party. still decided to stay in bed. thinking of what to play next.
woke up at 6:30. should have been earlier than that. drove down to los altos and the sun was shining along 880. i didn’t want to speed since i just got a ticket last month. it’s been a while since i haven’t gotten one. not that much of a big deal really. i just have to be careful next time. i’m still not used to not having a full sunrise by this time. it’s usually brighter last year. those longer days will be coming soon. i can’t wait. someone asked me why i had to drive about 40 miles to get to church when i only have one that’s just a block away from my place in berkeley. i guess the prayer’s worth it. sometimes the congregations to me get too overrated or somewhat commercially mainstream. i guess i’m just more satisfied with having just about 5-6 people gathering together in a humble chapel up in the hills to be more solemn about their intentions. it could just be me and i could be wrong. hendel’s four seasons playing.
had a trivial discussion with some classmates regarding how they wanted to live their lifeslyles when they graduate. one said he wanted success because according to him, women look more into someone who’s gone a long way with their goals. the other one explained that he doesn’t mind simply living in the mountains, planting vegetables, and just being happy. i agreed with just being simple. i guess people have their own ways of finding what happiness and their goals are. don’t get me wrong, but being financially wealthy is not a bad thing. but first one has to find the happiness of getting there before it can be attained. it’s ludicrous and vague on how i said it, but i can probably expound on it sometime. cantata from the marriage of figaro playing.
yeap, i guess i’ll be by myself for now. i don’t mind. there’s still a lot of stuff that i have to accomplish. holding someone’s hands while driving will be missed. feathering her body while lazily laying in bed on a sunday morning will be missed. cuddling on a cold weather evening will be missed. but i have other more important matters to attend to. seems like i’m being fickle on my stance. why do i sometimes think of just staying in a remote area in a forest to learn more about myself? something more fulfilling to the human impulse. somewhere more peaceful to develop something inside of me that hasn’t been unleashed to its fullest potential. maxwell’s whenever wherever whatever playing.
but we’re living in the metropolitan area. there’s a give and take. you have to learn and work to survive. of course you have to apply your skills from education, and even mere interest, to get the optimum performance. i keep on blabbering. kmel station kept on talking about the crazy raider nation partying even though the game hasn’t started yet.
was about to hit spreckels lake in golden gate park for tai chi when the road was closed because of a running event. decided to get breakfast and back to the east bay.